Ladies Who Lunch or Fitting In

A lady who lunches. As most retail outlets close between 12pm and 4pm and most food outlets remain open, this is what I guess I will become. I accept my fate willingly. I like lunch. But first, one must have ladies with whom to lunch. Being new in town, it is up to me to go about finding these ladies and so far, the process has been rewarding. Firstly, there seem to be plenty of ladies around and luckily there are plenty of events organised in order to come into contact with them. One of these organised events are 'coffee mornings'. Usually held at the compound restaurant, this is a chance to find out who's new and catch up with the old. Sometimes, there are goods being sold at these events, giving the ladies an opportunity to spend. Another organised activity is the  'shopping bus'. The bus leave twice daily from my compound, providing yet another opportunity to spend but also giving women a chance to shop independently of their husbands and to visit a different mall everyday of the week. Of course, it is possible to get around with a driver but these shopping busses are well planned, in between prayer time and this make sense, seeing as everything shuts down for a good half hour during prayer time. There are many activities to get involved in. Cooking classes, reading clubs, sports and craft style activities are advertised constantly on a TV channel dedicated to telling people what's on. What I find that I am liking, is being presented with opportunities to do new things. I didn't do so many new things in Ulm so I didn't really know this about myself. A couple of days ago, I got together with a bunch of ladies and made my own beaded keyring.  Something I probably would never have thought to do on my own, but it was fun to be creative, to meet new people and led to me signing up for future crafty events. One of which involves ceramics and what did I tell you? Lunch. I tried not to make my keyring too girly, as I intended it as a gift for Husband, but it remains attached to my keys. Oh well.

The pressure is on to look good in Riyadh, which might surprise some of you, because women are cloaked in an abaya and headscarf when in public. This puts a whole lot of emphasis on the parts that people can see. The sizing up of who you are, lies in the type abaya, shoes, handbag and sunglasses you wear. The abaya is something I am clueless about but locals  are discerning. As an example, my current abaya cost about 150 SAR which is about 30 Euro. I have seen abayas that cost 2000 SAR (about 390 Euro) and have been told about ones that cost 6000 SAR (about 1,168 Euro) so, I guess the sky is the limit. I spoke to a lady the other day who confessed to wearing more make up here in Riyadh then she ever did at home. Somehow, covering your hair and clothes can leave your face feeling strangely exposed. There is an urge to make this one part of you that people can see clearly, look its best. When people can't be distracted from that huge pimple by that funky hairdo you are sporting, concealer becomes your best friend. I too must confess to regular manicures and pedicures since arriving. God forbid you step out in open footwear with an unpumiced heel or less than polished toenails. 
Fortunately for me, I (think) I can tick off the handbag box. Husband (ain't he sweet?) bought me one that should score some points (I hope) on the Saudi scene. I am however, still rebelling with the shoes and the sunglasses. I know that the 10 Euro H&M slip-ons are not going to cut it for long nor will the two pound fifty Primark sunglasses but I will hold out for as long as I can. 

Which probably won't be for very long  at all. Sigh.  The changes one must make to assimilate. What I am hoping, is that I will get lucky and won't have to pay full price for what I am quite sure will become a habit. My justification? Well, I have noticed designer goods are heavily discounted here when new season stuff comes in AND seeing as clothes remain hidden under the abaya, technically I don't really need to shop for clothes for the next two years. Right?

Some excellent news!

I am pregnant. I am not sure if I have advertised that already somewhere here in another post. I am really not sure, as things have been so hectic of late. But now is the time to tell you all, I AM PREGNANT. This is by the way, not new news. I am about 33 weeks, well into my 8th month. This means people, that the baby is due next month. I realised that today, when I went to visit my doctor. It's the first time I am meeting the doctor whom I will be seeing regularly till the end of my pregnancy. Till the little fella is out here in the real world, which is, as mentioned previously - some time at the end of next month. According to this new doctor, lovely lady she was, it could be anywhere between the 25th and the 29th. Let's hope it's not on the 27th as she will be on a conference outside the Kingdom, she thinks. She isn't quite sure yet. The Kingdom, that is how people refer to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia here. Like the following, which you may receive as a friendly tip from a fellow expat when grocery shopping, 'Make sure you stock up on Oatabix, there are times when you can't find a box in the whole Kingdom.' A common problem here it seems. I was sure to buy two boxes the last time I was at the supermarket. Back to the point though, and the point is that I AM PREGNANT. There is a pregnant belly to prove it and a room full of baby furniture. I am all organised, things are prepared for his arrival. I have even got a pram, possibly the only one of its kind in the Kingdom. Gosh only knows we searched long and hard for it. Did I mention that the baby will be a boy? Reconfirmed again today by ultrasound, there can be no doubts now. I am hoping that writing it out in capital letters for you all today will help me to get used to the idea that indeed I AM PREGNANT. I am 8 months along and it still hasn't sunk in.

When I wake up to go to the toilet in the middle of the night (something I never needed to do without child) I find myself thinking in my blur of half asleep thoughts, Oh! That's right, I'm pregnant. That can't be right can it? Surely, I need to be a little bit more in touch with this whole experience? How will I deal with him when he gets here? I have no idea, and that is the scariest thing EVER. But the good thing is, my mum is coming. My mum, the woman who never owned a pram (with 3 kids!), who keeps asking me if I am in my sixth month and who tells me everything can be over in just a few minutes with a C-section, but crazily enough, I'd like to put myself through the torture of a natural birth. Yes, she will be here as chief support and I am really looking forward to it. I can imagine there will be moments when the two of us look at each other wondering, Right, what do we do now? and that will make me feel so much better. If, as they say, every baby is different, then surely there can be no expert on them. Luckily for me, my mum is not at all a know it all and that is great for me because I will end up feeling like I know a thing or two after all.

I know that I have lots of new news at the moment, I mean I have just moved to Riyadh and sure there is plenty to write about that too but I really wanted to get this pregnancy thing out of the way first. The other thing that has been bothering me is that I am not at all the way I thought I would be. I expected myself to be all 'earth motherish' you know? No to disposable nappies, yes to breastfeeding, no to epidurals and so on and so forth. But I am SO NOT! I find the less informed I am the better. One of my main botherations, and this may sound childish so please hold your judgement for a moment, is why they can't print pregnancy books without any pictures. I do not, repeat DO NOT at all feel inspired looking at other women in the throes of labour. I mean, we already know it ain't gonna be glamourous. Do we need the graphic confirmation? It just makes a nervous first time mother even more nervous if you ask me. I received a parcel in the mail the other day. That was exciting, my first parcel in Riyadh. A dear friend, who just had a gorgeous baby boy of her own sent me a book about breastfeeding. Don't even get me started on the pictures in that! Let's just say for some one who was pretty open minded about the whole procedure, I am now starting to wonder if I should get the whole thing over and done with in the first 6 months. It sounds terrible I know, and I shock myself with these unnurturing thoughts, but this is really what I am thinking. Perhaps, what I should be doing is avoiding books all together. I am such a visual person that images tend to stay in my head and haunt me, forever. On that note, I hope you haven't found the ones I have included here too offensive.

But of course, there is joy and excitement. We can't wait for him to arrive and change our lives FOREVER. I cannot tell you how many people have said that to me in the course of 9 months. Make sure you live it up now because when that baby arrives, it all changes. Things are NEVER the same again. You will NEVER get your time back. Your life will NEVER be the same etc etc. Not the most reassuring thing to say to a first timer is it? Please remember this when you are giving advice mums. This sort of thing leaves me wondering what on earth I have gotten myself into. The good thing is, since I am bursting to find out, I won't have to wait and wonder for long. My curiosity will be satisfied first hand in just over a month. Then I will be able to tell you myself, with first hand experience what, if anything, will EVER be the same again.